I really didn’t think it would come to this. I mean, I’ve thought before about starting a blog, but isn’t that kind of an arrogant thing to do? To assume my thoughts are interesting enough that I should make them globally available online? How very millennial of me. I was also afraid that the health-wellness blog realm was already saturated, and I had nothing to add. I was afraid to make myself vulnerable to the vultures of the internet.
Yet I really do love the handful of blogs that I follow, which I read with the same nosy interest as I do advice columns in the newspaper. And then last week I read a wonderful book called Big Magic, by Elizabeth Gilbert (also the author of Eat, Pray, Love). The premise of her book is that creativity isn’t for the sake of the consumer, but of the artist, and living creatively is a motive unto itself. But wait; is blogging really creative art? Well… maybe.
Once upon a time, I considered myself a writer. I wrote stories with my best friend at school, and I wrote poems in my room at home. I even won third place in a poetry contest, the highlight of my third-grade year. Then I graduated from elementary school, and realized that reputation is a fragile thing, and ‘coolness’ evaporates when you open your mouth. And of course, by ‘you’ I mean ‘me’, and God forbid I create something stupid and other people find out.
The writer in me took a hiatus, emerging temporarily in high school to relish essay assignments, (secretly of course, while groaning aloud with the rest of the class). After graduating I went to college, studied nursing, and became -predictably- a nurse. No more creative writing, unless you count the nurse’s note part of charting, which I don’t. In the intervening years, I’ve learned a lot. I’ve learned about vocational training, and workplace reality. I’ve struggled with work-life balance, and figuring how to exercise and eat right despite 12-hour graveyard shifts. I’ve developed a charming sense of sarcasm, and the corollary sense of humor.
Big Magic reminded me what it feels like to wake up excited to create, how the possibilities hover at the periphery of your thoughts even while you’re cooking, doing the dishes, or taking a shower. I miss that! I think that it’s time to start writing again. Just to be clear, the process is for me – to reflect, plan, even b*tch and rant a bit. But I’m choosing to share the product (without concern for however you, Dear Reader, choose to respond) because I know I’m not alone in this cosmic journey called life. I’ve finally spent enough time with myself, working out, following various diet fads, and studying health, to say confidently that I am passionate about health, wellness, and exercise. If my words resonate with just one other person, then I consider this blog a success. In the meantime, I’ll just get reacquainted with my voice as a writer.